Wow, a bit of a hiatus there. I am going to be honest, I hadn’t thought of the other two irrefutable truths when I made my original post. I should have just left it at two. Using my entire mental prowess though, I discovered two further truths and hiatus or not, here they are…

#3. The Saddest Moment in The History of Television/Movies: There are a couple I thought long and hard about. I mean who amongst us didn’t have to choke back tears when that boy’s horse got stuck in Quicksand in The Never Ending Story. I can’t remember the name of the horse, but I think the boy’s name was Atrayu. I also cannot say with 100% certainty, that Atrayu was indeed a boy. I think I spent a good half a decade just assuming he was a girl. Go back and watch the movie, it’s a toss-up.

I also thought of The Dirt Bike Kid and the scene where the dirt bike is snatched away from the kid. As they load the dirt bike onto the back of the truck, the bike lets out a very sad beep and the headlight dims. Then I remembered that when my best friend cried during that part I made fun of him for the better part of his life. So I guess I wasn’t too moved by that particular scene.

Hands down it has to be: The episode of the fresh Prince where Will’s Dad comes back and then leaves him again. You can laugh all you want, but I dare you to watch it without getting a bit emotional.

IN FACT, BAM. Here it is…


Saddest moment in recorded history.

Now my final IRREFUTABLE truth…

#4. PIZZA PIZZA SUCKS – I am not sure if it just us Canadians who get the privilege of this beloved franchise, but if so, it might be time for me to move South. Pizza Pizza is horrible. If someone tells me their favourite Pizza is from Pizza Pizza, I automatically think they are either hilarious or insane. If they are just being sarcastic about Pizza Pizza then they are hilarious. If they are serious they are insane.

I understand if you are out late at night and you need a Pizza fix, you sometimes get stuck with Pizza Pizza because of all the Pizza places in Canada, they are the one that stays open the latest. Why is that? It is because they know their exact target demographic is drunken people. You HAVE to be under the influence of something mind altering to ever confuse Pizza Pizza as edible.
That might be going too far, it is obviously edible, but when compared to ANY other pizza it is horrible. I bet one of those no name microwaveable pizzas taste better.

So there you have it – 4 irrefutable, indisputable, unarguable, cold hard FACTS.

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